PRETENDER:

actor, charlatan, deceiver, fake, faker, fraud, hypocrite, imitator, impostor, phony

 

Please don't lie to someone who trusts you, someone you have asked to trust you, asked to love and believe in you.  Don't lie to someone who holds and heals you.  Don't use them and strip their goodness away.  They will never be the same.

More Stories to Come

her affair

little league      the baseball bat      long walk past neighbors      

hawaii       chores         california  

I don't have any friends    

three's a crowd          lesbians  

lance to the heart      

no coaching allowed

         I'm sick of golf        buddha    

the sky is falling      walking in the rain

grocery money         fantasy life            

mother, father, sister    

  I'll pick you up   what's your sign  

tired since i met you      

you're the only one    

hey, how you doing              

 

 

One Woman's Truth

“What would happen if one woman told the truth about her life?  The world would split open.
-Muriel Rukeyser

 

Each of us has a truth of our own buried deep inside, a boundless sea of thought, feeling, emotion, upon which our outward persona sails, dark and stormy, calm and flowing, these are the currents that give us life. We humans are as fragile as any ship ever built and exposing our inner selves is not something we do naturally, an evolutional safety. Once or twice in a life time we may meet someone we feel safe enough with to open our harbor gates and let our true selves flow. It is both a thrilling and frightening voyage, and when it happens, changes us forever.

Being betrayed by someone you trust, changes you even more.

A story of betrayal is never just one story for betrayals don't come that way, they develop from a long legacy of betrayals. The person capable of betraying is incapable of certain thoughts and emotions, and operates from a deficit of character, predictably scripted by a scarcity of human bonding, repeated lacks of nurturing and acceptance.

When our reality has been shattered, we lose all faith and belief in ourselves, in life and the world around us. The one thing we all have, that no one can ever take away from us, is our truth.


 

 

Saturday
Jun192010

Summer time and feeling safe

During the last few years I have spent a significant amount of time away from home in order to avoid the man who abused me and who set out to destroy me for telling the truth, which of course exposed him as the very ill man he is. He felt entitled to steal what ever he wanted from me and destroy my life and to do the same to his wife. For years and years he lied to, manipulated, and used both of us, to say nothing of the countless other women. How dare we think we are entitled to the truth of our own lives!!!  

It is about time for me to hit the road again. I am going to visit someone with the same name as my abuser - if he exists - which I doubt, as there are no databases that contain any such person, but that is a whole other post. And then off to the far North to do more research for my book.

I love summer time, or at least I used to. I wish I could spend it doing the things I used to do, going to the places I used to go, always laughing, always smiling and having fun.  But now there is a lot of pain, and a lot of fear, and I feel safer being gone.

I'll keep posting and look forward to your comments and emails!   Have a great summer!   

PrintView Printer Friendly Version

EmailEmail Article to Friend

« mel gibson & the blame game | Main | poor poor me game »

Reader Comments

There are no comments for this journal entry. To create a new comment, use the form below.

PostPost a New Comment

Enter your information below to add a new comment.

My response is on my own website »
Author Email (optional):
Author URL (optional):
Post:
 
Some HTML allowed: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>