The Beginning Of The End

When It's Dangerous To Trust

"One of the common failings among honorable people is a failure to appreciate how thoroughly dishonorable some other people can be, and how dangerous it is to trust them."

-Thomas Sowell 

This is an extremely difficult story to tell. 

It is a heartbreaking portrait of a betrayal - and of the personality disordered.

You may think you've heard this story before, just another love story that didn't work out, but that is not the case. Something was very different, and very wrong. And nothing about it had anything to do with love.

Nothing that happened was usual or normal, except in the sad life of this disturbed man, who preyed on me, just as he had countless other women, and pulled us into his nightmare with lies.

There is no other way to describe what happened except as - frightening. Frightening that anyone could be capable of this kind of senseless deception and harm, let alone someone you have known for a long time, and that you trust and believe in.

The entire relationship was a deliberate act of selfishness and cruelty without regard for any of the other people who's lives were affected.

But it is an important story to tell.  One that needs to be heard and read by men and women everywhere.

We need to be aware when we are dealing with someone who is on the spectrum of abusive, from the selfish and dishonest, to the narcissistic and personality disordered; so that we do not become his or her next victim. So that we do not lose our families, our money and our feeling of safety and belief in the world.

The individuals committing this abuse need to be called out and stopped. And they need to see themselves and the damage they do to so many lives and change their behavior.

This is an up close, very personal look at one relationship, during one brief window of time, that tells a story of endless hurt and damage inflicted by one narcissistic man.

The story is told along with actual phone records. Why? Because it is physical, concrete evidence that is crystal clear and irrefutable. There is no other possible meaning or interpretation; this man wasn't unsure, lost or mistaken, it wasn't an instance, or two or three, or four, of bad decisions, or miscommunication, or momentary lapses of judgement, or even ignorance....................this man was disturbed.

When I discovered that he was lying, manipulating and betraying me, which was before I saw the phone records, I could rationalize and make excuses. He could, and did, continue to lie, evade, minimize and distort the truth, all the while vowing his undying love and commitment to me. It was indescribable pain.

But after seeing the phone records, an even deeper level of pain and fear set in when I realized the depth of his sickness, and so, without a doubt, will you.

Knowledge is power, and we all need to know when someone is dangerous to trust.